| Catch Up |
"My solution is to feel the jealousy and embrace how it feels. It’s hot on your skin, cold in your heart, knotting in your stomach, tingling in your fingertips, burning your toes... It’s enough to make you dizzy, enough to make you irrational, uncaring, even heartless. I’ve been driven that crazy just because Jeremy was hanging out with his friends instead of me." 10-8-07
"Will: But let's face it, you're 18, going on 19, live with a man in his mid twenties who makes ends meet inking people up, you want to get married and have a kid and you still live in your Parent's Attic while wanting to get a third person along in your relationship. THINK BARBIE THINK!" 10-7-07
"Tell me why... porn sucks! No, really, I’m serious. I would think, being a bi-sexual female that I would love porn, because it’s designed for guys, and I want to see the same things guys want to see. I want to see tits, I want to see penetration, I want to hear her yelling, and I like lacy undergarment." 10-6-07
"I was such a kid, but had developed the needs of an adult. What a dangerous situation, and I guess I should be grateful that everything happened the way it did. I could have lost my virginity to some stranger I met on the Internet. I could have been beaten or raped. I could have gotten an STD. I could have become a drug addict. Honestly, I’m not sure who I would have become if Jeremy didn’t stress how important it was for me to be a lady. Those words are still with me, and I think they saved me from the slipper slope." 10-5-07
"All I’ve been looking forward to all of my life was having a family, a baby of my own, a home of my own. I finally have a stable enough relationship to make that possible. I’m finally old enough to make that possible. I don’t feel the desire burning for children like I did over a year ago, but I feel ready enough, yet terrified. Not of raising the child so much as giving birth to it." 10-2-07
"This blows. I don’t think I can ever be happy with this situation. It’s like I never get enough time with him. Night, after miserable fucking night of him falling asleep before me, of watching shows, and just not talking, not interacting, not touching. It’s so lonely. All day long I long for his touch, his kiss..." 9-27-07
"I’m actually happy I decided to become a Mary Kay Beauty Consultant. It’s not as easy and glamorous as they make it out to be when they want you to join, but it’s very rewarding in knowledge, and if you’re sociable enough, very rewarding in money." 9-25-07
The Circle of the Phoenix (A writer/artist/photographer group)
Poetic Phoenix (My poetry)
ArtzPhoenix (My art)
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